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02-14-2013Each Time you Love, Love as if it's Forever
Happy Valentine’s Day! As a Libra ruled by Venus, I am a total sucker for romance. And as no surprise, I end up answering a lot of love questions in sessions. This morning I was reminded of an Audre Lorde quote I had read: "Each time you love, love as deeply as if it were forever." With the nature of the work I do, so often I am asked whether or not I think a relationship is “the one,” which I suspect to mean “the one monogamous partner I will bind with legally and spiritually until death do us part.” We were taught to believe in forever relationships and in the romantic notion that we would have one magical partner with whom to walk through all of life’s ups and downs. I think for many people, this belief can lead to shame and guilt if the relationship ends for some reason- no matter how justified; and it can cause patterns of stuckness in those who muscle through the struggle of staying in an unhealthy or expired relationship. In my work, I see both patterns present in the charts of my clients and also how these patterns can manifest in physical, mental, or emotional self-destruction.